Auctions Kick Ass.

Yes, yes they do. So I was sitting here on a Saturday night, doing absolutely nothing as usual, then got a call from Shane. He was bored (Without his girlfriend), so he came over and played some Xbox, nothing special. I remembered it was a Saturday, and I decided that we were going to the auction in Rhode Island. I hadn't been in quite a while, like seven or eight years, but it was my last weekend here so I might as well sit with a bunch of weird people and bid on stuff. When Shane and I got there, we had no idea where the door to go inside was. After standing there like two kids with down syndrome, someone walked out and we heard the door close then went in. This place smelled like a bag of assholes lit on fire, then smothered with some chunky vomit. That wasn't even the worst part. After sitting down for about 30 seconds, I noticed the floor was wet, then looked up to see if it was coming from the roof. Bam, water dripped right in my face, mmmm. I moved and actually started looking for crap to buy. I just couldn't keep looking straight ahead because there were so many ugly people, and I just had to keep looking down and thanking God I had all my teeth and clean clothing. The auction had so much junk, I couldn't believe it. Boxes of dusty books for 2 dollars, old rugs, just some weird random shit. After an hour and a half, I ended up with a box of Ring Dings and a box of Yodels. each for a dollar, I was somewhat happy. Shane had nothing, so it made me even more happy. My black brother showed up, along with Fat Kyle and my dad. Jeff and Kyle were drinking, so they were yelling random shit at the auctioneer like "I'll give you a dolla to shut up bitch!" Yeah, the guy didn't like that. After it was over, Shane wanted some bar neon light things, so we dug through a MOUND of stuff and found a few. We also stole one, just because we knew no one was going to find out/ stop us. So if you ever want to feel more secure of how you look, or theres nothing better to do, go down to Danny's Auction. I have a new slogan for them, "Danny's Auction, where we sell shit to people who look like shit."